The Help

Have any of you watched the movie 'The Help'? Its based on the book of the same name by Kathryn Stockett. It takes place during the civil rights movement that took place in America during the 1960's and speaks of three women who are extraordinary in their own way- Aibileen Clark, Minny Jackson and Eugene 'Skeeter' Phelan. Skeeter, an aspiring writer, is a young woman who returns home to Jackson, Mississippi after graduating from Ole Miss. She finds that her beloved childhood maid Constantine has quit, and cannot get over the fact that she didn't write to her before leaving. All her friends are married and having kids and she dreams of having a career as an author. She gets a job as a columnist about home-making in the local paper. She asks her friend Elizabeth's maid Aibileen for help, and is uncomfortable about the way her friends treat the household help. Like they don't have feelings, like they aren't human. This inspires her to write a book based on the lives of maids who have spent their entire lives taking care of white children.

'The Help' is true to its name. It gives you so much insight into other people, into ourselves. It helps us understand how inhuman we can be. These African-American women, spend their lives feeding, bathing and dressing other people's children, and those children grow up prejudiced against the women who actually brought them up. Every morning, Aibileen comes to her employer, Elizabeth Leefolt's house and wakes up her daughter Mae. She tells her this mantra everyday, "You is kind, you is smart, you is important", because her mom couldn't be bothered with her. These women love these kids like they do their own flesh and blood, and probably even more than their own parents and they end up being treated worse than the dirt on one's shoes. It requires a huge heart to love someone else's kid, especially when that someone treats you like you have a disease. How is it human to treat someone like they are not even real people? Humanity isn't a human instinct. Before being accused of plagiarism, let me tell you my mother said that.

The sad part is, that we, in India, don't treat our help any better even now. Most of us treat them like they don't have a life of their own. Forget about the way we treat our servants, what about our caste system? We decided that some people in the society weren't even worth speaking to, forget about that we thought we shouldn't even touch them. 'The Help' is a mirror to all of us. It shows us that all of us are capable of cruelty if we want to be. All of us want to feel superior to someone else, even if we hate to admit it. Deep down, we do. Its a part of us that most of try not to show, but it comes out in different ways. 

I never forgot the way Aibileen speaks to Mae Mobley. She was a little girl who was never told that she was pretty, never carried around by anyone other than the maid, never loved. That too is a kind of discrimination. Not being loved because she just wasn't pretty? She was a little girl! All little girls should be told that they're pretty, no matter what. I have to admit, watching this movie, moved me, touched me, and made me want to become a better person!

Biology is Not Destiny

As I write this I'm watching 'We the People' where the debate is about whether Indian women are combating bias in the armed forces. I honestly don't understand why most people think that women aren't brave enough to join the army or the navy or the air force. Women are capable of more courage than anyone. How does a country progress when its women are facing discrimination? How exactly does Finance Minister Chidambaram expect to end gender discrimination by just allocating 200 crores in the budget. Is that going to change the mindset of men? Forget about men, is it going to change the mindset of mother-in-laws? I frankly think that the mother-in-laws are the absolute worst! Most of them are under the delusion that just because they gave birth to sons, they are somehow superior. They feel like they have every right to subject the daughter-in-law to a life of slavery. They feel they have every right to make her cook an entire meal when she's recovering from an illness. They feel they have every right to decide what the girl wants to do with her life. How many cases of abuse, both mental and physical goes unreported every year in India? Why do people in India still believe that a woman's job is to cook good food, wash the clothes and be the perfect hostess? Anything else, she's called aggressive and over-ambitious. We may say that people's mindset is changing. But is it really true? Would a man willingly stay home with the kids, do the cleaning, cooking and grocery shopping? Or would he predictably think its beneath him?
Just because you're a girl, it can't determine what you do with your life. I don't think I'll ever stand being written off just because I'm a woman. If anything, we should be respected more because we are women! At the risk of sounding conceited, what makes men better than us? I mean, we can do what they do. Actually, we do it better than them most of the time! I resent the fact that some men assume that as soon as a woman has a baby, she is duty-bound to quit her job and devote all her time to taking care of her child. Not that I'm saying its a bad thing if a woman wants to spend time with her child, but the man will not consider it for a second, because the man is the apparent breadwinner, isn't it? God! When will men stop being the sexist, chauvinistic pigs that they have been since the beginning of time?

Lessons Learnt From A Chick Lit

Hmm... I don't think I've gone on such a long break before.. What does one do when suffering from writer's block? I started to write two posts, left both halfway! And I plan on making writing my career! Jolly good, isn't it? I hate writing bad stuff! Mostly because my mom gives me a hard time time about it but also because I feel unsatisfied with a bad post...  I haven't been reading much for the past few days, other than the occasional chick lit! People may call it trashy, but I don't think there's anything wrong with reading for pleasure. I mean what's the point of reading at all, if you aren't getting any pleasure out of it? I also think that if one doesn't get pleasure from what he/she reads, he/she don't even learn anything. Because it's only when you derive pleasure from something are you willing to learn from it. I don't understand the people who only read Malcolm Gladwell and then act as if they're superior to the ones who love books like Harry Potter.

There's always a lesson to learn from everything. From Lord of Rings, you learn that size is no estimation of power and that if you have friends all burdens are easier to bear. From Harry Potter you learn, that love is the strongest power in the world. From To Kill A Mockingbird you learn that you never really know anyone unless you step into their shoes and walk around in them. What my point is, is that every book, every film, is trying to send out a message! I think the message that chick lits send out is to never lose faith in true love. Because once you do, your view of the world turns a little jaded. It's my opinion! I love chick lits because it's nice to just get absorbed into the happening lives of young women, a lot like us in many ways and watch them find their soulmate! I love books, so I tend to speak of them very often! Don't mind me! This post is repititive, I know! But I just couldn't think of what to write!